雅思9分作文如何寫—蘭州環(huán)球教育培訓(xùn)學(xué)
2016年08月15日 18:08 來源:
天小編特意為大家別邀請(qǐng)我的美國(guó)朋友(同樣研究和教授雅思)“按照我的要求”寫了一些文章,讓大家分享一下,希望大家都成為蘭州雅思9分大人,呵呵。
Children who grow up in families which are short ofmoney are better prepared to deal with the problemsof adult life than children who are brought up bywealthy parents. To what extent do you agree ordisagree?
Some feel that the children of low income families are better equipped to deal with difficultiesposed by the "real world" when they grow up and they also believe the privileged children ofwealthy families are less fit to deal with these difficulties. The implications and veracity of thisargument seem self-evident, but in fact require closer examination. (58words)
點(diǎn)評(píng):1+1 模式,***1句為主題句。此段的主題句稍微有點(diǎn)特殊,它的確否定了前面所提到的觀點(diǎn),從而表達(dá)出了自己的觀點(diǎn),此外還引出了下文。特別是***半句:but in fact require closer examination,感覺是在拋磚引玉。
The popular wisdom is that children of poorer families learn early on the value of a buck, andare thus naturally better suited to stretching moneywhen times get tough in adulthood.Inversely, the children of wealthy families, thoseborn with a silver spoon in their mouths, arebelieved to be completely ignorant of the value of money, having had everything provided forthem in their youth and oftentimes erroneously expecting the same situation in adulthood. Theyare believed to be prone to overspending and financial irresponsibility. This belief, thoughlogical, overlooks one key point which is , of course, education. (100words)
點(diǎn)評(píng):1+3 模式,第1句是主題句。請(qǐng)注意,從此段的內(nèi)容來看,這是個(gè)讓步段(即分析自己并不贊成的觀點(diǎn))。雖然4段論的作文的主體段是兩面討論,但是本人還是喜歡這樣的寫作,即主體段的觀點(diǎn)還是有側(cè)重的,把讓步段放在前面,***1句話引出下一段,這樣過度地很自然,而且自己的觀點(diǎn)也比較明確!
The basis of this argument is, of course, knowing the value of money, and the idea that childrenof the poor know this, and those of the wealthy do not . Who though, is in a better position toteach their children the value of money; someone skilled in earning and keeping it, the wealthyparent, or someone who can not seem to acquire it, the poor parent? Both wealthy and poorchildren are equally likely to acquire an education in money, whether it is formal, or in theschool of hard knocks. Conversely, both children are as likely to ignore this education. (101words)
點(diǎn)評(píng):這段的內(nèi)容感覺寫得不夠直接,還是在分析對(duì)方觀點(diǎn)的漏洞!請(qǐng)注意,前面讓步段已經(jīng)這么寫過了,那么這一段比較好是正面地論證自己的觀點(diǎn),這樣從內(nèi)容上來說更c(diǎn)onvincing 一點(diǎn)!此外,需要說明的是,大家發(fā)現(xiàn)作者的內(nèi)容還是有一定深度,但是這是要有一定的英語(yǔ)功底才行的!如果英語(yǔ)功底不行的話,建議內(nèi)容不要寫太深,因?yàn)槟菢尤菀自斐煽脊倏床欢阍谡f什么!
A poor child may believe that one can get along, if not as easily, without wealth. A wealthy childmay be well trained by a parent steeped in the knowledge of money management; the key todeveloping this skill is education.
點(diǎn)評(píng):***一段有點(diǎn)像是提出解決這個(gè)問題的辦法,即education. 它沒有像傳統(tǒng)的結(jié)尾段那樣簡(jiǎn)單的重申自己的觀點(diǎn)。
總結(jié)之總結(jié):
全文的觀點(diǎn)有待揣摩,作者很明顯是不贊成題目的說法,即Children who grow up in families which areshort of money are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children who arebrought up by wealthy parents. 但是作者自己是更偏向窮人家的孩子呢,還是富人家的孩子呢?!根據(jù)文章來看,作者是中立,他所看重的是他們所接受的教育。In other words,整篇文章又是一次中立的寫法。在雅思作文中,這種寫法經(jīng)常使用,還是非常實(shí)用的,大家可以學(xué)習(xí)一下。此外,文章中有很多好詞好句,特別是長(zhǎng)句,值得模仿一下。大家就可以在蘭州雅思評(píng)分中拿到雅思9分做蘭州雅思9分達(dá)人。哈哈
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